By La’Toya Guillory
Our hearts can be tricky, but we can’t live without it. To truly love without conditions, often, will require a heart check. We can’t be naive to think that marriage is all peaches and pancakes. It takes work to build a long-lasting relationship. The Bible tells us,
“The heart is deceitful above all things and it is extremely sick; who can understand it, and fully know it’s secret motives.” – Jeremiah 17:9 (AMP)
So, what do we do with this information? How do love our spouses beyond the stress at work? What do we do when they seem to be unlovable? We check our hearts. “I hear what you are saying La’Toya but what does that look like?” I’m glad you asked. First, you must know that a healthy marriage starts with a healthy foundation. You and your spouse must be moving towards the same things in order to remain solid. The Bible says,
“How can two walk together unless they have agreed to do so.” Amos 3:3 (NIV)
Secondly, you must die to your selfish ambitions. Marriage is no longer just about you. It’s about your spouse and children also. God’s plan for you is greater than your plans for yourself. When you pursue His plans and purposes for your life, your family will follow suit.
Third, your vision for your family must outweigh your own bitterness and unforgiveness. It is so important to get to the root cause of the issues in your family as well as your marriage. Understand that your past is not your future and generational curses are real. You must figure out what they are and allow God to be the author of your story.
Before I give my last point, I want to set the stage. A long time ago, God descended from Heaven and commanded the earth and everything in it into existence. After He was done, He said that it was good (Genesis 1:31 NIV). My friends, you and I were created during that time and He marveled at us. The Bible tells us that He knew us before we were in our mother’s womb (Jeremiah 1:4-5 NIV). Know this my friends, we are His masterpiece and every flaw belongs to HIM.
No matter who you are or where you came from, He knows you and He has called you His. So, before you choose to throw in the towel, before you choose to call it quits, remember that you belong to Him first. His love for you outweighs every negative thing that you had to go through. It outshines every person that made you feel like you were not good enough. His heart for you can take you places beyond your wildest imaginations.
An anchor provides a firm foundation as a ship goes through a storm. It provides stability to that ship or boat to keep it centered or in one place without going astray before it’s time. My challenge for all marriages is to check your heart and find your Anchor (God). Because He makes all things new.