Love isn’t always lovely
By Kelly Mouisset
Last year, my husband and I began working with couples who are about to say “I do” to the love of their lives. It was an opportunity for us to look inward at our own marriage and to tweak a few of those things that caused friction and offense. I can remember having a “discussion” just a few minutes before one of the couples showed up. I almost felt like a hypocrite, but as God would have it, the lesson we were discussing was on how to handle disagreements. It was the perfect opportunity to show the couple a real life example of how even if you are a Christ-follower, you still face difficulties in relationships, especially with those you love the most.
We were open and honest with them and gave several examples of how our relationship isn’t Facebook perfect, but it is God-centered. We disagree, our feelings get hurt, we see things from our tainted perspectives and we feel offended at times. As Christians we are commanded to love each other as Jesus has loved us. We often forget the Jesus part and we want to love others as they have loved us. If they are short or snappy, we want to love them as they are loving us by being short and snappy back, but Jesus wants us to love as He loved, with forgiveness and patience in our hearts.
No marriage is perfect. Love may be patient and kind one day, but look more like offended and broken at other times. Marriages are full of memories from the past, good and bad, that mold our thoughts and expectations of what is to come or how others will respond. They are ever evolving and growing. It is up to both spouses to help it grow together and ensure God is in the center.
“My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you.”John 15:12 (NIV)